Sunday, 7 June 2020
Sex is not an obligation
The first step to fully enjoying sex is to understand the way we see it and relate to it. This activity should not be seen as an obligation to please the other person, sex is an encounter, an activity that generates pleasure that should be enjoyed. If you don't see it that way it is important to analyse what is making you feel like it's an obligation, so it will be easier to determine why this is happening.
Even though for some couples, planning a romantic dinner that will surely lead to sex can make the encounter more satisfying, as the excitement of anticipation can boost your libido.
The mind and imagination
The writer Octavio Paz wisely said: "in every erotic encounter there is an invisible and always active character: the imagination". Imagination is important, imagine a different way of bringing about this erotic encounter with your partner: wear a garment that stimulates the senses, or a sex toy that blows our minds. Sex should not be seen as something rigid and full of rules, it is always an experiment between you and that person, while always in the spirit that you will enjoy sex more when with your partner.
Try different positions
If you're a girl and you have difficulty reaching orgasm there are positions that could help you by stimulating your private parts more and making it easier for you to reach your pleasure peak. The important thing is that you don't get frustrated and don't focus on this issue, because far from helping you it will make you more tense, making it harder to enjoy the sexual encounter. If you feel that you have a problem don't hesitate to see a specialist.
Talk about what you like
Do you think the problem is that you always do the same thing? As with any problem, talking is always important and that also includes talking about sex. If there is something you particularly enjoy in bed or if you feel that your partner fails to do exactly what detonates you, it is important to guide them. Each couple is different and each sexual encounter is too. The important thing is that person knows what you like and how to get you to that point, you can even try some of your deepest sexual fantasies if you previously talk about it with your partner.
Stimulate the senses
Sight, touch, smell, all these senses play an important role in sex, so it is important to try to encourage them. Put on underwear that you know your partner likes, perfume or scent that always drives the other wild, caressing them in the right place, these are the things that over time can be ignored but it is very important that you always do them. They are the little details that let you enjoy sex much more with your partner. Think about them and use them again as a tool in your favour. Go wild with foreplay to drive your partner crazy.
Complexes outside the bedroom
We all have, physically, our strengths and weaknesses, and they should not stop us from enjoying sex. Love yourself and accept yourself as you are and remember that sensuality is a combination of elements, including your attitude. Make a promise to yourself to always try to keep that sensuality alive, without letting any complex affect you.
Play and enjoy without critique
Again sex is not only physical, it also involves the emotions, so it is important to play with each other, stimulate, provoke, establish an intimate language of seduction and enjoy each encounter as it is without many too many demands. Criticising your partner's sexual performance will lead to an increasingly reduced and less satisfactory sex life.
Seek help
If you can't relax, if you can't use any of these tips or if you did but they didn't work, it is time to seek help and consult a specialist, because the ultimate goal is to get back to fully enjoying sex, and only an expert can determine if there's an underlying problem, so open your mind and don't be afraid of getting a professional assessment.
Tips
- Keeping the flame alive, using your imagination and never stopping from experimenting are the three important key factors when it comes to enjoying sex.
- Sex is a bonding moment with your partner, allowing you to create an atmosphere of intimacy and communication, so it is important to address this issue as any other in your relationship.