Saturday, 2 May 2020
Why Men Cheat?
Why did he do it in today’s article? I’m going to explain the exact factors that are involved when a man cheats and how you can prevent it from happening to you in the future. Stay tuned.
A question that women come to me constantly with is why did it happen?
- Why did he go off to this other girl?
- What caused him to cheat?
Well, what I want to do today is explain the factors behind cheating. And the reality with cheating is there’s no one single factor that leads to it. It’s a combination of five different factors that can all contribute in their own ways to a man cheating or staying loyal.
I want to explain those factors for you today. And in today’s article. I’m going to give you a real overview as to how those factors come together to lead to a man either cheating or staying loyal now in subsequent article. What I want to do for you is explain these factors in more detail.
So I’m going to make this into a little six-part series and in each of those follow-up articles. I’m going to explain these factors on an individual level and how you can help with some of them.
You can’t control all of them, but there are some where you can play a part to minimize the chance and to make it virtually zero once you understand the factors once, you know how to choose the right men of infidelity .Happening to you.So the first Factor that’s involved in a man cheating is the most important one
1.Unmet Need(S)
now cheating never happens when someone is getting all their needs in every area now some of those needs maybe subconscious.
So this could be someone who thinks they’re getting all their needs and then still finds themselves cheating. So unmet needs what would be an example of an unmet need.
Well, if a man feels emasculated that could be an example of an unmet need if a man isn’t feeling the excitement or passion that he wants that could be an example of an unmet need.
- He might not have the self-esteem as an example of an unmet need that you can’t control.
- He might say be feeling unloved or appreciate it.
- He might feel insecure.
There’s lots of reasons that men will cheat due to an unmet need in a relationship and some of these you can control and some you can’t in the follow-up article. I’m going to go into these unmet needs and the ones that you can control and how you can make sure that your man in the relationship has those now I want you to remember here as well this Never an excuse for cheating.
I’m not excusing cheating one little bit, but they are reasons.
The better you understand these reasons the more you’ll be able to prevent it in your relationships.
So there’s always some sort of unmet need on a conscious or subconscious
2. His Fear Of Loss.
So his fear of being single is what it essentially amounts to you see when a man has an unmet need. He always has the option to leave the relationship or communicate about it.
And if communication fails he always has the option to leave the relationship but fear affects men a lot more than what most women think it does a lot of men have a real fear of being alone.
I’ve had players straight up tell me guys who are cheating on the girlfriends. I’ve had them straight up tell me I’m not going to leave my girlfriend because I’m scared to be alone.It sucks right.
It’s pathetic Behavior, but it’s better to be aware of it and know that it happens a guy’s fear of loss how scared he is a being single will contribute to the chance that he will cheat because if he has a big unmet need but he’s not afraid to be single the guys going to talk about it and then walk away from the relationship before he cheats.
So the third Factor that’s involved is probably going to surprise you
3.It’s His Genetics And His Upbringing
there is a massive genetic component to monogamy.
People always ask me David. Do you think humans are naturally monogamous?
There’s no answer to that.
There’s no yes, there’s no no, there’s no men aren’t monogamous. But women are it’s a fluid concept. The fact is some people are more monogamous. Some people are less and there is a big genetic component to monogamy the book by Helen Fisher.
It’s called why we love it’s a fantastic book. And if you’re interested in this area, I strongly recommend it. I’m going to talk more about the genetics and upbringing component in the following article, but essentially some people are genetically more monogamous than others and their upbringing effects
epigenetics- is a concept where your genes will change based on your upbringing and certain genes get turned on and off. So the way they were brought up risk factors like substance abuse in the house risk factors, like single Parenthood or double Parenthood all these things will change epigenetics and on an aggregate level on a generalized level will affect a man’s risk of cheating.
4 His Values
some men have a really high value for monogamy. They believe in it, perhaps they have had a church-style upbringing they really really value that highly other men don’t believe in monogamy at all. It’s just not their thing. This is different to their genetics and their upbringing this is their conscious values. And this is the things that they really hold important.
For example, let’s say that a man has a huge value for monogamy and hugely is genetically monogamous.
Well, if that guy has an unmet need he’s probably not going to cheat compared to the player who doesn’t value those things as much
5.The Final Factor Involved Is The Impulsiveness Of His Character
very few people who set out to cheat plan to cheat that day.
There’s some hoodoo by all means but most do it on an impulse and they will be the first ones to admit that it was freaking stupid after they’ve done it cheating often comes from impulsive personalities and impulsive characters.
So the more impulsive a man is the higher risk factor in that way.
With that being said I’ve tended to be with impulsive people. I know lots of women who are with impulsive men who have never cheated the unmet needs aren’t there.
Maybe they don’t mind leaving or maybe they just have a really high value on monogamy impulsiveness alone does not mean a man will cheat but it is a risk factor involved in an important one.
So those are the five factors and the different way these add up together is going to affect a man’s chance of cheating.
For example, let’s say that a guy has a somewhat High unmet need but a very high fear of loss.
He mostly values monogamy and he mostly has the genetics towards monogamy and he’s a middling impulsive character.
Well, his fear of loss is high. So he’s not going to leave the relationship.
He might communicate about it. But let’s say that that doesn’t come through for him and that he’s not getting that need met. He’s still going to be too scared to leave even though he has a mid-range value for monogamy that unmet needs going to increase and increase and eventually he gets Self into an impulsive situation maybe he gets drunk again not an excuse but a reason and he does something stupid and cheats.
Let’s take maybe a different example where the guy does have a middling range unmet need but his fear of loss isn’t that high? He values monogamy. He’s genetically more monogamous and he’s not such an impulsive character.
Well, that guy’s unmet need could get quite high but he’s probably not going to cheat. He values monogamy too much and he’s not afraid to leave the relationship if it comes to it that guy’s a little low risk of cheating take the player the player may not have a big unmet need at all.
He might have a little bit of fear of leaving but he might just have no value at all on monogamy and know genetics towards monogamy no belief in it, by the way, if you want to know how a man if a man values monogamy and how he values it ask him if he’s ever cheated in his relationships that can be a clue ask him if he believes humans are naturally monogamous.
That’s a big clue.
And I asked him if he believes loyal marriages and relationships exist.
So if you want to know that fourth Factor, if you want to know about how a guy values monogamy that’s a way to find out about that risk factor.
But you know, as I was saying that player might be really impulsive and so he doesn’t have a big unmet need he may not even have a giant fear of leaving the relationship but it has no real value on monogamy and he’s pretty impulsive so That Guy cheats in the next article.
I’m going to go through into each of these factors and the unmet needs is an important one because that’s the one where you can have some influence and there are certainly things you can do to make sure that your man is happy and getting his needs met as much as you can as much as in your ability to minimize the chances of infidelity in a relationship.
Again, this isn’t an excuse but it is a reason you would want your man to make sure that your needs are being met in the relationship as well not to necessarily even avoid you cheating, but just to show his love for you.
So that gives you a rap as to the factors involved. You can see some of those factors unmet needs for example choosing a man who values monogamy you can have an influence on Other factors are just out of your control of his fear of loss is way too high and he’s not willing to confront it if he’s not geared to that way with his genetics and he’s a very impulsive character.
Then there’s not much you can do.
So these are the factors that contribute and I really look forward to the follow-up videos where I’m going to explain each of these so that you can understand them and the better you can understand them the more you can minimize and make virtually Zero by picking the right man and knowing the causes infidelity in your relationships in the future.
I really hope you enjoyed the article. leave a comment. I’d love to hear your thoughts on the article. Leave a comment below. I want to hear from you guys and I’ll see you soon.